Unknown Unto Dust.. (Excerpt from 10,000 Sleepless Nights)

English: pons. Images are from Anatomography m...

English: pons. Images are from Anatomography maintained by Life Science Databases(LSDB). 日本語: 橋。 画像はLife Science Databases(LSDB)のAnatomographyというサイトより。 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I will speak of an earnest truth, a truth of a fear, that when my days are done, none will be there to gather me.

It is such a strange thing, to be so aware of the end of my days, and know that crucial moment, at any time so near, and  not trouble myself.

Instead I find my thoughts go to a worry that seems both pointless, and inconsequential, what will be done whith what remains of me.

Who will come and collect Me, will I be remembered..

Of those things that were me when  I breathed what will become of them, will they know why I kept them.

Will it all scatter, and will I just fade, Unknown unto dust?

This is a part of me, my deepest fears, that took the form of my writing in 2009. At that time, as is the case now, I struggled with the knowledge that at any time my life could end,(The area of the stroke in the pons is a very dangerous one, and the arachnoid cyst doesn’t help that) and what I will leave behind to this world.

Ten Thousand Sleepless Nights at its core is about coming to terms with that fear, as much as can be with words committed to print. I do not hope it is my legacy, I just want people to know why I feared for my legacy in the first place.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s